Selma Blairis my hero.
I too have a chronic illness (fibromyalgia).
But dancing weekly in a competition that pushes completely healthy folks' bodies to the limit?
Selma Blair and Sasha Farber dance a jive to “Jailhouse Rock” on Elvis night.ABC/Christopher Willard
How would that go?
Questions I regularly find myself asking include: Do I have the energy to commute to work?
How about some low impact exercise?
Selma Blair and Sasha Farber dance a quickstep to “The Muppet Show Theme.".ABC/Christopher Willard
Cooking myself a meal?
The list goes on.
And her performances were beyond my wildest dreams.
Selma Blair with partner Sasha Farber on ‘Dancing With the Stars’.Eric McCandless/ABC
Here, I also want to pay tribute to her professionaldance partner, Sasha Farber.
May we all find someone with his grace, understanding, and compassion.
I’ll admit, I was crushed by the news at first.
The ‘Dancing With the Stars’ cast surrounds Selma Blair after she announced she was leaving the show early.Eric McCandless/ABC
It was hard for me not to feel a little despair at her decision, a little defeated.
What she did, the choice she made, was a heroic one.
Because she chose herself.
Selma Blair dances a waltz to Andra Day’s “What the World Needs Now Is Love” with partner Sasha Farber.Eric McCandless/ABC
Indeed, it took visible damage in an MRI to get Blair to hit the brakes.
But by competing onDancing With the Stars,Blair made the invisible visible.
She put a face to the quiet courage it takes to get through the day with chronic pain.
There are those who will see Blair’s exit as the embodiment of being defined by your limitations.
But it was, in fact, the opposite.
The thrill of victory and agony of defeat is a false binary.
Putting yourself and your health first isn’t giving up or making concessions for your illness.
I’m still struggling to learn this lesson.
It’s a very hard lesson to learn.
But choosing yourself and choosing rest require a lot more courage than charging ahead with blinders on.
Courage I’m still trying to find, that Blair’s journey is teaching me how to look for.
It’s what you prioritize and honor within yourself in spite of that siren call of possibility.
Because sometimes, anything is not possible.
And that’s more than okay.
