We’re halfway through our two-episodeThe Bachelorettegauntlet, rose lovers!
First, the most important news:
All hail our returning Bachelor Nation hero,Chris Harrison!
“I’m taking these hometowns very seriously,” says the Bachelorette.
Credit: ABC
“I have eight really amazing men here, but I can only meet four of their families.”
Will Blake be one of those four?
Today’s one-on-one date will help answer that question.
ABC
And the theme of today’s date is…pseudoscience!
“My name is Geeta, and I’m a reiki crystal master!”
says the braided lady.
ABC
“And I know that you both are here to seek some answers about your relationship.”
Geeta has them smash stones and choose crystals out of a covered bowl, and then this happens…
I feel like I need to tell him that."
ABC
Wow, thanks Geeta I guess reiki really works!
Well sir, you must not have been paying attention.
And the carnage ain’t over, rose lovers!
ABC
“Hometowns are next week, and I know how much family means to you,” she says.
I don’t want to lead you on."
Riley is stunned and frustrated.
ABC
“I don’t get it!
What am I missing?
What am I missing?”
ABC
“Why keep me around so long?”
And lo, the second Reject Limo of the night drives away as Tayshia sobs.
“I’m so sorry,” she wails in the darkness.
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“I didn’t want to hurt anyone.”
Hang in there, honey.
(Meanwhile, did anyone come and get Blake’s suitcase?
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And is someone gonna pack Riley’s stuff for him?)
“How much did you guys hate on me while I was gone?”
And guess what, dude bros?
ABC
The rose ceremony is happening sooner than you think!
Which means the longest goodbye ever finally comes to an end: Adios, Bennett and Noah!
See you inParadise, most likely.
On to the abbreviatedMTA all gas, no brakes!
Here are the highlights:
Ed’s been working on his one-linersRehashing his beef with Chasen (‘memba him?
Kenny (‘memba him?)
Noah dismisses him as “the One Direction party-boy manager wearing camo, with your star tattoos.”
“Canadians rise to the occasion,” jokes the host.
As for Kenny’s “bikini wax” moment?
Let us never speak of it again.
Yosef’s gonna YosefI’m sorry, butwhydid we need to see this dude again?
Interesting that he showed up, given that he wasso concernedabout missing out on time with his daughter.
None of the other dudes are excited to see him, if Riley’s side-eye is any indication.
“At the end of the day, Yosef, we could have said no,” says Kenny.
“You weren’t there.”
I would never mind anyone talking to my daughter like that’?"
But Yosef still refuses to own up to his assholery.
“If my daughter did something like that, I would hope someone would call her out.”
Jason, like all of us, cannot believe what he’s hearing.
This wasn’t a set-up, okay??
“I wish, ‘cause that would mean I had a little bit more preparation,” she says.
(Did I use that expression correctly?
Don’t answer that.)
Awwww, poor Riley.
It’s too bad they would make a gorgeous couple.
Welp, rose lovers, “hometown” dates are tomorrow.
Are you satisfied with Tayshia’s final four guys?
Who are you rooting for?
And is it just me, or does green juice look disgusting?
Post your thoughts below!
The Bachelorette airs Mondays and Tuesdays at 8 p.m. on ABC
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