George Costanza said it couldn’t be done.
As you might imagine, rose lovers, it made quite a stir.
The Bachelorettes and their men have saidau revoirto Franceandsalutto Bruges, Belgium.
Logan drops the bomb.ABC
“I feel really confident in the guys that are here for me,” she says.
That’s a shame.
“Before this group date takes off, I need to talk to Rachel,” says Logan.
That lady’s gonna need a Tide stick.ABC
“I need to tell her I can’t go, and I need to tell her why.
I have no clue how she’s going to react.”
Dude, have you met Rachel?Of courseyou know how she’s gonna react!
[Sad trombone noise].ABC
Ugh, let’s just get this over with.
And for those reasons, he’s out.
Rachel, how you doing over there, girl?
Logan tells Gabby he wants her back.ABC
“You accepted so many roses from me,” she marvels.
“I appreciate you telling me I just wish it would have been earlier.”
Logan tries to soften the blow by rambling about how great she is, but Rachel cuts him off.
Rachel’s got a point.ABC
“You don’t have to keep going.
I get it,” she says coolly, before showing him the door.
As soon as Logan is gone, Rachel breaks down.
How much Windex do you think the staff goes through in a week?.ABC
“Something’s clearly wrong with me,” she sobs.
Anyhoo, the Team Rachel guys are blissfully unaware of this drama.
Right now, they’re watching two dudes wrestle each other in what feels like a vat of chocolate.
Tino and Rachel on ‘The Bachelorette’.ABC
Back in her cabin, Rachel is still a wreck.
“This is two weeks before hometowns!”
she says through her tears.
Gabby and her dudes in Bruges, Belgium.ABC
It’s truly shocking we’re onlytwo weeksfrom hometown dates?
I feel like this whole “journey” just started!
“I’m feeling really disappointed,” sighs Tyler.
Blech.ABC
Welp, rose lovers, here goes nothing!
Logan heads to Gabby’s cabin and attempts to pull areverse Mesnick.
Gabby doesn’t seem too shocked.
Love them so much.ABC
Still, she’s not ready to welcome Logan back into the fold.
“I just want to check in with Rachel,” she says.
“I want to always, always, always put my friends first.”
Rachel and Aven go “sightseeing”.ABC
Amen to that, sister!
“Of course, he had to do that before the date.”
Gabby is shocked shocked!
I now pronounce you way too comfortable kissing in public.ABC
to learn that Rachel canceled the group date because she was so upset about Logan’s bombshell.
“Logan just came in and dumped me for another Bachelorette,” explains Rachel.
“This is humiliating.Humiliating.”
Johnny, Gabby, and some lurkers.ABC
That’s because HE IS NOT.
Onward to the second half of the group date!
The first thing Rachel does is fill the guys in about the Logan drama.
That looks like it hurts.ABC
“If anyone has any concerns or wants to leave, obviously let me know.
I’d rather know now.”
(God, I really hope that was just creative editing.)
Johnny gets the rose.ABC
At least some of the men do a better job consoling Rachel during their one-on-one chats.
“I’m sorry you had to deal with that,” says Ethan.
“I want to make you smile, and I want to make you happy.”
Nate is just too sweet.ABC
“Tino continues to be truly open and vulnerable with me,” she gushes.
And thus, Tino gets the date rose.
Do I understand what Gabby’s wearing?
Put this in the Louvre.ABC
No, I do not.
But she’s a grown woman and I trust thatshe chose it and feels comfortable in it.
(And the guys love it, too.
“I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her,” notes Jason.)
This woman is an icon.
Other Bachelorettes could never!
But Gabby’s not done embarrassing them yet!
I’m here for it.
“It’s just refreshing not to have to worry about drama,” says Nate.
Dang it, Nate don’t you know you should never utter the “d” word?
Drama is like a vampire; it can’t enter unless you invite it in.
The other men do NOT love it.
“I guess we were thinking that she saw her person in the guys here,” sighs Nate.
“I just don’t know what to think right now.”
For his part, Logan tells Gabby that he’s grateful for her second chance.
“I’m very into you,” he says with a grin.
Suck it, Logan.
The next day, Rachel has her one-on-one date with Aven.
There’s a lot of this:
Pssst… guys!
You’re supposed to be taking in the sights.
Yeah, we noticed.
I think you’re able to guess what happens next, rose lovers.
Iemand pak de slang halen!
(That’s “somebody get the hose” in Dutch.)
At dinner, Aven uses the time to Open UpTM to Rachel about his childhood.
His parents were not together, and he lived with his dad for much of it.
“I didn’t get to see [my] mom that often,” he says.
“It sucked.”
Once he got older, though, Aven says he and his mom grew “really close.”
Do I need to tell you that she LOVES it?
Aven gets the date rose.
You may now make out with your date (again).
And we’re down to the final date of the week.
Johnny and Gabby, you’re up!
Hmmm… should we be worried about those black-clad figures lurking in the woods behind them?
I hope this isn’t aThe Hills Have Eyessituation.
Nah, it’s a brewery!
Two very nice Belgians named Ann and Vincent greet Gabby and Johnny and begin plying them with beer.
They do seem to have a great time together and are constantly laughing and joking.
He does, right on cue.
“That was the last time I really let my guard down,” he explains.
“I’m like the least confident person ever.”
(Quick, someone get Jason in here to talk up the benefits of therapy!)
Gabby can relate, and she appreciates how willing Johnny is to be “vulnerable” with her.
Awww, give him the date rose!
Okay, fine they’re very cute together.
Still rooting for Nate, though.
Hey look it’s almost time for the rose ceremony.
“I’m sorry about that,” says Logan, trying to smooth things over.
“I think you guys understand my intentions.”
SHUT UP, LOGAN!
Gabby just gave Nate some Belgian chocolate for his daughter, and his reaction is beyond adorable.
I just love these two so much.
(They literally don’t show any of Rachel’s conversations with her guys.)
Once again, I say: Ugh, let’s just get this over with.
Rose ceremony roll call!
Team Rachel: Aven, Tino, Zach, Tyler, and Ethan.
Team Gabby:Nate, Johnny, Jason, Spencer, Erich, and Logan (blech).
Much like most of Bachelor Nation, Rachel is bummed to see Logan get a rose.
I smell some major producer interference.
Safe travels back to the States.
Welp, rose lovers, that was an eventful week.
Post your thoughts below!
