On the 30th anniversary of The Muppet Christmas Carol, God bless us every one.
To oversee the merriment, we recruited No.
Watch the video above, or read a complete transcript below.
Jacqueline Jones/The Muppets Studio
BRETT GOLDSTEIN:Hello, and welcome to Entertainment Weekly’s Around the Table.
My name is Brett Goldstein.
I’m an actor, a writer, a director, a plumber, and I love the Muppets.
Jacqueline Jones/The Muppets Studio
Should we start with you, Kermit?
KERMIT: For me, the best memory, it’s being together.
It was the first movie that we’d made in quite a few years.
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It gave us a chance to play and to have fun.
It’s the best part of everything we do.
Isn’t that right, guys?
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MISS PIGGY: For me, It was how Sir Michael Caine let me borrow his Oscar.
Mikey, I promise I will give it back to you very soon… maybe.
ROBIN: My favorite part was when Tiny Tim didnotdie.
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GOLDSTEIN: Oh, man.
I think a lot of people really, really,reallylike that part.
GONZO: My favorite part?
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Being Charles Dickens, a great author whose last name rhymes with chickens.
Let’s face it.
I was perfect for the part.
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KERMIT: You sure were.
GOLDSTEIN: Was that how they sold you on it, Gonzo?
GONZO: Yeah, plus I got to go to London.
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GOLDSTEIN: What was that like?
GONZO: Oh, it’s great.
I’ve been there a lot before, but I love it.
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I got lots of friends there.
I go out in the country and visit farms.
Piggy and I go out and visit farms together.
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MISS PIGGY: What?
GONZO: I visit the chickens.
She visits the pigs.
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MISS PIGGY: That is not true!
You’re making things up.
KERMIT: Maybe move on to the next question, Brett, before things get heated.
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GOLDSTEIN: Thank you, Kermit, for keeping things on track.
Do you guys have a favorite moment in the film?
KERMIT: The skating on the ice.
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That was a lot of fun, especially for a frog.
GOLDSTEIN: You were a very good skater.
GONZO: And you’re very old too.
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GONZO: Well, you go back to the pre-Cambrian era.
KERMIT: No, no, no, no.
I’m just saying that we have not had ice in the swamp since then.
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That’s what I’ve been told.
It’s old frog lore.
Don’t you have any lore from your… whatevers?
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GONZO: I don’t know any other whatevers.
KERMIT: How about Robin, what about you?
Do you have a favorite moment from the film?
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ROBIN: Oh, gee.
There was so many.
I liked the whole movie.
Actually one of the most difficult parts for me was pretending that Uncle Kermit was my father.
I kept calling him, “Uncle Kermit,” instead of Father Dad.
KERMIT: That’s okay.
You did a great job.
GOLDSTEIN: That sounds right.
GONZO: My favorite moment was flying across London with the Ghost of Christmas Past.
You really haven’t lived until you’ve hit a church steeple at 60 miles an hour.
GOLDSTEIN:Which Muppet would you say is the biggest Scrooge?
But the truth is, they’re really good guys.
Don’t you guys think they are?
GONZO: Well, they must be.
They come to every one of our performances.
KERMIT: That’s right.
ROBIN: I always thought they were being punished for something.
KERMIT: It kind of feels like there’s a “but” coming.
MISS PIGGY: Why but?
KERMIT: No but?
MISS PIGGY: He could stand to wear some clothes every now and then.
KERMIT: I knew it was coming there you go.
GOLDSTEIN: One of the things I love about the film is it’s genuinely pretty scary.
Was there anything you held back on?
KERMIT: Well, we were a little bit worried about the ghost of Christmas Yet to Come.
It’s a very frightening character.
Fun fact here, and thisisa scoop, Brett, but I actually was up for that part.
MISS PIGGY: Yeah, you’re not very intimidating.
GONZO: You’re reassuring.
ROBIN: I just had to cover my eyes during that whole part.
In fact, Mr. Brett, just let me know when you’re done with this question.
GOLDSTEIN: Okay, I will.
ROBIN: I’m going to hide behind my cocoa.
Not that I got one.
GONZO: But in the moment, it was scary.
She’s not telling it quite right.
ROBIN: This isn’t as scary as I thought it was going to be.
GOLDSTEIN: you could come out from behind the cup.What’s your favorite song in the film?
Do you have a favorite?
ROBIN: Oh, I enjoy the overture by Mr. Paul Williams.
It opens with the mournful clarinet, but also “Thankful Heart.”
KERMIT: Yeah, they’re all great, in my opinion.
It all comes down to our good friend Paul Williams.
MISS PIGGY: That’s right, Kermit.
How did you know?
KERMIT: Well, I’ve known you a long time.
GOLDSTEIN: What about you, Gonzo?
What’s your favorite song?
GONZO Well, I’m with Kermit.
They’re all great songs.
GOLDSTEIN: You all live in Hollywood?
MISS PIGGY: Sometimes.
KERMIT: I’m bicoastal.
GOLDSTEIN: What was it like filming in snowy London?
KERMIT: Oh, wow.
Yeah, we shot the originalMuppet Showthere.
It’s always felt like a second home to us.
ROBIN: For me, I loved playing in the snow and sledding.
We don’t get to do much sledding in the swamp.
ROBIN: You attempt to sled and you just sink in the water.
MISS PIGGY: I adore London.
Being there givesmoia chance to catch up with the Royal family.
KERMIT: You saw the Royal family while we were making the film?
MISS PIGGY: Well, they were out of town while we were making the film.
GONZO: I just love London.
Where else can you eat food with names like Bubble and Squeak, Mucky Drippings and Rumpty-Thumps?
KERMIT: I think we all agree, we really love London.
GOLDSTEIN: Well, I’m glad to hear it.
You’re welcome back any time.
That’s coming from me and the Royals.
MISS PIGGY: See?
MISS PIGGY: How do you like them apples?
GONZO: I’m just going to ignore you.
GOLDSTEIN: Do any of you know why this film is such an enduring classic?
MISS PIGGY: Because I’m in it.
GONZO: As Charles Dickens, let me just say, thank you for the compliment.
GOLDSTEIN:This was the first film that the Muppets had made that was not an original story.
What was it aboutA Christmas Carolthat made you guys think, This is a good fit for the Muppets?
GONZO: Well, I think it was a good fit because of two words: public domain.
As Charles Dickens, I know.
They didn’t have to pay me a cent.
GOLDSTEIN: So Gonzo, playing Charles Dickens is not the normal part you are known for playing.
What challenges did portraying that writer give you?
GONZO: The handwriting.
Quill pens can make a lot of curlicues and flourishes.
To be honest, I had to use a stunt calligrapher.
KERMIT: I didn’t know they had those.
GOLDSTEIN: There’s a whole union for them.
This is the first Muppet movie where you weren’t the lead.
I think you’re absolutely fabulous as Bob Cratchit.
Was that a difficult adjustment?
Was there any pushback from you about the decision not to be the lead?
KERMIT: Oh, no, no, no.
I understand Bob Cratchit.
He always gets overwhelmed and he tries to hold things together no matter how crazy things get.
That is exactly what I do with the Muppets.
That worked for me.
MISS PIGGY: Is that a good thing?
GOLDSTEIN: Yeah, it’s an incredible performance.
MISS PIGGY: Because usually that’s not a good thing.
That’s not what I aim for it.
My talent shines through and calls attention tomoi.
She wants to be as visible as possible at all times.
Was it difficult to be…
I don’t know how to put this.
What I think is impressive is it’s not that big a part or that glamorous a part.
I wondered if any of that was difficult.
MISS PIGGY: Well, yes.
Of course, I was concerned.
But Dickens here refused to change the story, so I just threw myself into the part.
GONZO: Well, Brett, when I wrote it, I wasn’t really anticipating a pig.
KERMIT: Were you anticipating a chicken?
GONZO: Of course.
GOLDSTEIN: Robin, if I could talk to you for a second?
ROBIN: Yes, yo.
GOLDSTEIN: You play Bob and Emily’s son, Tiny Tim.
It’s a heartbreaking performance.
I can’t hear the sound of coughing without crying.
That got pretty quickly rejected.
GOLDSTEIN: Oh, Robin, yo don’t cough.
ROBIN: I’m sorry, Mr. Brett.
GOLDSTEIN: Let’s talk about Michael Caine.One of the great performances of all time.
He should have won an Oscar for that.
What was it like working with him?
Did you learn anything from him?
Did he learn anything from you guys?
GONZO: Well, what I remember about working with Michael was having a sore neck.
He was very tall and I always had to look up at him.
KERMIT: Michael was fantastic.
He seemed to enjoy working with us from the very first day.
ROBIN: He even came back the second day.
MISS PIGGY: That’s how you know he’s a great actor.
GOLDSTEIN: So tell me how the music came about.
Was Paul Williams left to his own devices, or did any of you help?
KERMIT: Well, yeah, Paul, he read the original story and the script.
In fact, he may be the only one who ever did read the script.
MISS PIGGY: There was a script?
And all we had to do is sing.
ROBIN: And venture to stay in tune.
GOLDSTEIN: Kermit, do you still count the number of sleeps until Christmas?
KERMIT: Oh, of course, doesn’t everybody?
ROBIN: Boy, I sure do.
MISS PIGGY: Formoi, every day is Christmas.
GONZO: Yeah, she’s very big on getting presents.
Brett, I just hope you brought some.
MISS PIGGY: Oh, did you bring me a present?
GOLDSTEIN: Uh…
KERMIT: [leans over to whisper] Say it’s in the car.
MISS PIGGY: Oh, good, I can’t wait, I can’t wait.
How do you feel about it?
ROBIN: It was great fun.
Did you know the whole thing was improvised?
KERMIT: Yeah, yeah.
We all learned it as tadpoles, and I’m pretty sure that that’s available on Splashify.
GOLDSTEIN: Can we get a snippet?
It’s the same words over and over.
GOLDSTEIN: I don’t want you two to ever stop.
KERMIT: It’s very repetitive.
ROBIN: It’s a folk song.
GOLDSTEIN: Robin, “Bless Us All” is such an emotional song.
I can’t hear it without crying.
How do you get through it?
Well, gee, I was so nervous, I just wanted to get it right.
GOLDSTEIN: Thank you very much.
ROBIN: Okay, here we go.
[Begins to sing “Bless Us All”]
KERMIT: No, no, no.
We don’t want Brett to cry.
ROBIN: Oh gee, I’m sorry, Mr. Brett.
GOLDSTEIN: It’s all right.
You have a real power.
KERMIT: It does feel good though, doesn’t it?
But actually, Rizzo is put through a lot worse.
What was the biggest injury you sustained on set?
And what was the hardest stunt to film?
GONZO: You know, as an actor, I use the Stanislavski method.
KERMIT: Wait a second, Gonzo.
You’re saying that you learned that from Stanislavski?
GONZO: Yep, good old Crash Stanislavski.
KERMIT: Different Stanislavski.
Okay, got it.
I’m sorry, Brett.
Can we talk about the song “When Love Is Gone”?
There were some times when it was cut, sometimes it was back in.
What do you guys think?
Is that song canon?
MISS PIGGY: I still say it would have been better if I sang it.
KERMIT: You say that about every song, and Gonzo, it’s a different kind of cannon.
GONZO: Oh, not the boom boom?
KERMIT: No, not the boom boom.
MISS PIGGY: Ooh, yes!Pride and Prejudice, I’d love to do that.
Brett, you’ve got pull in this town.
Can you getPride and Prejudice and Piggygreen-lit?
GOLDSTEIN: I think you and me together.
I play Darcy, you play
MISS PIGGY: Elizabeth.
Yes, oh, that would be perfect.
GONZO: I think you’ve got pull, but Piggy has push.
MISS PIGGY: What’s that supposed to mean?
GONZO: No, it’s just technique.
MISS PIGGY: Yeah, I have lots of technique.
GOLDSTEIN: I hope you don’t think this is weird, but this film is my Christmas tradition.
I watch it every Christmas Eve.
Do you have a favorite holiday tradition?
KERMIT: Getting together with friends.
GONZO: Falling down the chimney.
MISS PIGGY AND ROBIN: Opening my presents!
ROBIN: Oh, haha!
MISS PIGGY: I guess we have the same tradition.
What are the ways you venture to do that or would encourage others to do?
KERMIT: Well, I would encourage people to spread the spirit with gratitude.
ROBIN: You took my answer, Uncle Kermit.
KERMIT: Well, you know, I think it’s kind of a universal answer.
ROBIN: It’s a good one.
Especially if you never take down your decorations.
KERMIT: That is true.
GONZO: Well, I would say love yourself and appreciate the weirdness in others.
ROBIN: No, it’s “Every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings.”
KERMIT: That’s pretty good there.
I’ve got, “Here’s looking at you, kid.”
That’s pretty good, right?
That’s my Bogart.
ROBIN: What is that?
KERMIT: That’s Humphrey Bogart.
MISS PIGGY: Or, how about, “All right, Mr. DeMille.
I’m ready for my close up.”
GOLDSTEIN:Muppet Sunset Boulevard?
MISS PIGGY: Ooh, I like it.
We’ll pitch that one at the same time as we pitchPride and Prejudice.
GOLDSTEIN: What a double bill.
KERMIT: Good luck to you.
GOLDSTEIN: Thank you.
You going to produce?
KERMIT: Oh sure, if you’ll have me.
GOLDSTEIN: 100 percent.
KERMIT: All right, let’s do it.
I think the package is getting better and better.
GOLDSTEIN: It really is.
That is all we have time for today.
I want to thank the Muppets for making my dream come true.
you might watchThe Muppet Christmas Carolon Disney+, complete with “When Love Is Gone.”
My name’s Brett Goldstein, and this has been EW’s Around the Table.
Have a wonderful holiday, and lastly, Robin?
ROBIN: God bless us every one!
KERMIT: That was so nice, Robin.
ROBIN: You know what would also be nice, Uncle Kermit?
KERMIT: What’s that?
